35 Funny Ways to Say You're Going Plant Shopping (You'll Laugh At These)

What is your favorite way to tell your significant other that you're going plant shopping... without saying as much? Here are some unusual and hilarious ones!

Photo: Andrew Martin

One way to say you're going plant shopping is: "I'm going to look at some tools"... when clearly you're going to look at plants.

Another example: 'I'm going to buy groceries honey."

If you already have too many plants but you're secretly going to buy more then you get bonus points! 😆

Here's what some of our private FB group members said about how they disguise their plant buying intentions.

Can you relate?

Funny Plant Shopping Quotes

"I’m lucky. My significant other loves plants as much as I do"

"I'm going to the grocery store." Seriously though... I never tell them anything, but I'm going to look at plants. It brings me joy. 🤷"

I told him I was going for sphagnum moss, and asked how much was in the acct. He didn't answer. I came out with a very overgrown green pothos for $12. He answered me and it was so hard not to go back for the huge sansaveria cylindrica.

I just go and buy what I want. No need to ask or explain if you have your own money.

"I gotta make a couple of stops..." or "I'm going to get groceries."

"Do you want to go to Home Depot?" 😁

I just go. No one to worry about telling lol.

"Can we go to Lowes please lol."

"I'm going to go look at plants."

Your partner should encourage your hobbies, or at least not be a dick if they don't get it. 🙂

"Honey, I'm going plant shopping..." he knows me too well for me to say otherwise. 🤣🤣🤣"

"I say lets go see what's green!" He loves to plant shop too.

Either “I’m running errands, oh and I need your truck”😂 or I just leave the house, nobody needs to know. 😂 I used to be really proud if I was making a trip to the garden centre but now I’m slightly embarrassed because I’ve realized I have a problem and I need P.A (plants anonymous). Oh, and I also have no more room/proper lighting but continue to buy plants. I ended up buying a grow light... 🤪

"I just bring them home and say: ”Look what I saved today!!!" Or "but I didn’t have one, or the one I have does better with a partner.“ 🤣🤣

"“I brought this baby home.” 🤣"

"I don’t really say anything, I just go when the urge hits."

"I need a 'me' day."

"Imma run to Lowe’s to look for some stuff for the house" is my go-to line. Then when I get home with new ones I say: “they weren’t giving these babies enough sun.” Or: “they were giving them way to much water so I had to save them.”

"I say nothing, then sit back and see if he notices my new plant friends." 🙂

"I brought one home yesterday and he still hasn't noticed!!"

Last night we were getting ready for bed, and I looked at my boyfriend and was like, "Sooooo...... I went to home depot....😳"

"I just show up with plants and let him ask where the hell they came from."

I always tell my hubby: “The plants WANTED me to buy them.” 🤷

I buy the ones on clearance at work and whine: "But it was THE LAST ONNNNNEEEE! It was lonely!"

Don't tell, just go! New plants appear at my house constantly! I worked hard to buy more green babies.

Might as well be honest, he already knows lol.

I say: "I'm goin' to the garden center."

I just bring my partner along in hopes he will pay. 😂

I go by myself on my lunch break.

I come home with a new one & say I traded for it... traded money, that is. 🤫🤣 It could be worse! I tell mine I could be doing bad things or hanging in bars...and plants are healthy for me. LOL!

I just say I’m going to the store.

My daughter & I are partners in crime..... we say we're having a girls day out. 😁😁

I don't tell him lol then when i get it home i start rearranging a section of plants and just slide the new babies in the mix... 😁😊

It’s too late for me. I don’t care what anybody thinks. Lol

Well there you have it - some hilarious plant shopping quotes about what people tell their significant others to cover up their plant buying adventures.

We hope you enjoyed this one as much as we did... there was definitely some snort-out-loud laughter on our end.

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About The Sassy Plant

Hi, we're Dan & Kat. We love plants and gardening and wanted to share what we've learned along the way with you. The Sassy Plant is a cheeky take on plants, gardening and home. Go here to learn more about us. We hope you enjoy!